Hey everyone! My awesome friend Joshua wanted to share his testimony with you. Thanks so much for sharing Josh! Sending prayers and blessings your way!
As God would have it, I went throughout my whole school career having a pervasive development disorder known as “Aspergers Syndrome”. It’s a high functioning form of autism and has gained much attention over the past several years. Personally, I have a hyper active mind and that causes me to think about possibly anything except the task at hand. I experience below average or zero short term memory. Yet, I can remember an entire day from 1996 down to my outfit. And I still fight social anxiety because social settings are stressful and more difficult than for “neuro-typicals”, people without autism. I overcame the disorder, alongside self-diagnosis of an eating disorder, post traumatic stress disorder, social phobia and anxiety, from sexual abuse (rape) at the age of ten or eleven, plus, being raised by my wonderful single mother.
As a Christian, I walk close with God, my Father, and redicated my life to Him in 2008. At 19 years old, this was a decade after being raped and me tearfully and painfully confessing the event to my mother, I was liberated. After bouts with severe mental depression, sexual confusion, pornography addiction, masturbation, a life of loneliness and no girlfriends, drugs, alcohol, wild, life threatening parties, domestic abuse, faced with homelessness, air mattress nights and a dim, misunderstood, flawed life outlook (denying autisms place in my life to the core), I stand a young/old 24 years of age. God has kept me and will continue to do so.
I was searching for God, love, purpose. No dad around. I made TV, celebrities, hedonism and self pleasure my gods, idols. I tried it. Began reading my Bible at 19 years old, my party stage. God was speaking to me. I was raped and thought I had a deadly std. A false complex. Anyway, I had panic attacks, fighting God’s will. I quit. I confessed to my mom that I was raped and I was liberated. Set free.
I was a babe but wanted to be a pastor. Preaching, judging anyone next to me. Through trial and error in my walk, and struggling to this day to kill sin, I have a pretty good head on my shoulders now. I was a super pharissee from 19 years of age to very recent times. Scaring people away from God. I still love God, and I want to bring Him glory. Giving up more of my life each moment, trying with all that is in me, at least. Learning biblical manhood and I don’t really belong to a church. I was at a church which felt good at first. But after three long, servant oriented years, I learned of false teaching, and the prosperity gospel. Praying about that situation. Sometimes I attend a particular Presbyterian church I totally enjoy worshipping together there. Christ centered grounds. I just need to go consistently, prayerfully. Pastor John Piper and desiringGod ministries really encourage and challenge me to grow in Christ. They have plenty of free resources and I thank God for my adopted family there.
To His praise and celebration, I live life with purpose, encouraging whoever may be next to me at any given moment, in different methods. I am passionate, compassionate, motivated, humbled, perfectly lead, intimately family oriented loving and also any bad thing you could think of.
The human heart is the most deceitful of all things, and desperately wicked. Who really knows how bad it is? ~ Jeremiah 17:9 (New Living Translation edition Bible)
God’s indescribably perfect love, grace, mercy and forgiveness is my everything. And I pray, through my God’s honest testimony of providence and His awesome character, my life story will stir your heart to come back to Jesus, God’s Son, the Risen Saviour of the world.
For God loved the world so much that he gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life. God sent his Son into the world not to judge the world, but to save the world through him. ~ John 3:16, 17 (New Living Translation edition Bible).
That’s all…for today! Haha. God bless us all. Life is meant to be lived.
Jesus told him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one can come to the Father except through me. ~ John 14:6 (New Living Translation edition).
Amen. My family is the best. I love you! God is Love. Grace and peace to all who read my growing story.